We often admire those who have immense success but we seldom think about what one may have to experience and overcome on the path to achievement. Far too often we conceive of “failure” and “success” as mutually exclusive. How could someone fail their way into success?
Hopefully by the end of this article the absurdity of thinking those who have reached the pinnacle of success in their fields have never failed – or benefitted from their past failures will be apparent.
Firstly, I would like to address some of the benefits I believe we can reap from our past failures. It is worthwhile to note that in order to learn from our failures, we must be humble enough to be students of failure.
Failing should not be conflated with inferiority; in fact it is a sign of courage and growth. Far too many people do not attempt to make their dreams a reality because they have convinced themselves that failure is either inevitable or too painful to bare. Failing is far less painful if we know we have given our best effort toward achieving our goals. The only regrets I have in life regarding attempting to accomplish goals are situations where I had unfortunately convinced myself far too soon that the effort wouldn’t make a difference – only to later realize that hard work coupled with perseverance would have allowed me to attain success.
Will Smith articulates this point very clearly in an interview:
“I’ve never really viewed myself as particularly talented. I view myself as slightly above average in talent, and where I excel is ridiculous, sickening work ethic. While the other guys sleeping, I’m working. While the other guy is eating, I’m working… the majority of people who are not achieving the things they want ..is strictly based on being out worked..”
Will Smith accepts failure as necessary on the road to success. It may even seem as if he has convinced himself it is inevitable unless he truly commits himself to his craft. This mindset is responsible for the massive success he has had in his career.
It is for this reason that I believe this message is so important to disseminate. In many ways, the rest of our lives could depend on it. So, what exactly can we learn from failure?
We can learn from our mistakes
This is where becoming a student of our failures becomes imperative. If we learn precisely why we have failed to attain a goal, rather than being discouraging it can be rather liberating and encouraging. We are given the knowledge to improve our future efforts, and if we are careful we can avoid the same mistakes that we made in the past. With the knowledge gained from past failures, we can become better future versions of ourselves, furthering improving our later chances for success. We must actively seek out feedback from those more successful than ourselves and those evaluating our efforts. Nobody can be perfect, but it is in the pursuit of this perceived ideal that we find success and valuable lessons.
It humbles us…
Often we convince ourselves that we no longer need to improve at a given activity. Perhaps you are a basketball player who believes he is an excellent free throw shooter and has decided not to practice them any longer. Or perhaps you are a young football (American) player who has convinced themselves they are a great catcher and have decided to no longer craft this skill. How about a student studying for an exam who is convinced they know all of the material for a class, when in fact they have been avoiding the challenging material and only studying material they already know well? It is absolutely essential that we miss a free throw during a championship game, drop a catch during the super bowl, or receive a C grade for us to humble ourselves and admit we have a lot of work to do before we can truly be considered great at our craft. The issue is partially one of familiarity and comfort; it is much easier to do things we already excel at or are familiar with. But this is not how we improve. Working on what we are worst at eliminates weaknesses and truly increases our chances for success at whatever we may choose to pursue.
Failure allows us a means to self-reflect
Often when we fail, we are presented with two options. First, we can make excuses about why we failed and complain. Although this option is quite popular, it does not make us any more likely to succeed in the future. It is okay to feel anger and sadness upon failing. It is a sign that we care, but we must pick ourselves back up.
The second option we are left with is to learn, plan and improve. We must look at not only why we failed at a given activity, but also at our personalities more fundamentally. Do we think negatively often? How much effort did we truly put into the goal that we failed to attain? How much did I sacrifice? These are some of the important questions that need to be addressed for a failure to be turned into something positive. After we spend some time with these important questions, we must make a plan. Plan how we want to spend our time, what we must sacrifice and who we keep around ourselves. This must be done specifically and clearly – have goals that can be measured and set dates for achieving smaller goals that allow for the bigger picture to form. From this, improvement will follow.
Failure builds character
If we handle failure correctly we can learn how to deal with adversity and cultivate a will that transcends both small and large road blocks. On the path of achievement, there will be many days where you may not feel like doing work, or you fail despite giving your best effort. Once we have learned from many different failures, it becomes much more apparent how to effectively navigate the negative emotions and discouragement that accompany failing or self-sabotaging behaviour. The will that is cultivated through turning every failure into a learning experience acts as a catalyst for future achievement.
J.K. Rowling addresses this point in her Harvard commencement speech:
“..some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you’ve lived so cautiously that you might as well have not lived at all; in which case you’ve failed by default. Failure gave me an inner security.. failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way.
You will never truly know yourself or the strength of your relationships until both have been tested by adversity. Such knowledge is a true gift for all that it is painfully won and it has been worth more than any qualification I have ever earned.”
In conclusion, failure if used properly is one of the most valuable tools available to anyone hoping to achieve a goal – especially if we must extend ourselves greatly in the pursuit of said goal. In my last attempt to elucidate this point, I have included a quote from Sarah Lewis (a Yale educated Harvard Professor) to describe how failing can propel us on to better things.
“..success motivates us, but a near win can propel us on an ongoing quest. One of the most vivid examples of this comes when we look at the difference between Olympic silver medalists and bronze medalists.. the frustration silver medalists feel compared to bronze who are typically a bit more happy.. to have..not received fourth place..gives silver medalists a focus on follow up competition. We thrive not when we have done it all, but when we still have more to do.
The reason the near win has a propulsion is because it changes our view of the landscape and puts our goals .. into more proximate vicinity to where we stand. This is what a near win does, it gets us to focus on what right now, we plan to do to address that mountain in our sights.”
It is my hope that this message can help some of the children of Malawi. Learn from your mistakes both in and outside of the classroom and you will be able to transcend even the worst of situations.
About the Author
Kumsa Yuya is an Ethiopian born Canadian who has recently graduated from the University of Guelph in Ontario, Canada. In the pursuit of his Criminal Justice and Public Policy degree he has become particularly interested in issues surrounding social justice and human rights. Law, politics, prison reform, religion, sexuality, education, and race are among the topics that he is most interested in.
Main picture: The recent flooding in Malawi affected everyone including Urunji Child-Care Trust. Our offices were flooded, leaving us incommunicado at a time we desperately needed to be in touch with the outside world. We pulled through – learning from this unfortunate situation to protect our property in the future.
Bibliography
J.K. Rowling Harvard Commencement . Dir. Harvard Magazine. Perf. J.K. Rowling. 2011. YouTube. Sarah Lewis: Embrace the Near Win. Dir. TED Talk. Perf. Sarah Lewis. 2014. YouTube. Will Smith: Talent vs Hardwork. Perf. Will Smith. 2014. YouTube.
